“I’m scared I might be pregnant! I was giving a guy a handjob in a hot tub and he didn’t come but I’m scared that the precum could have traveled through the water. I’m on birth control but the night before I gagged on the pill and threw it up. I took the pill right after this happened but I’m still scared. Please help!”
I’m all about safe sex, but the chances of getting pregnant from this are basically zero. You’re all good.
“I get so so turned on by American Apparel ads. Is that weird?”
Considering they’re pretty crazily pornographic, not really! (This is entirely aside from the debate about whether the ads are good or degrading or appropriate or whatever, naturally.)
“My male lover always sneezes when he orgasms. Is that normal? He does it almost every time and sometimes he accidentally headbutts me when he does it.”
This isn’t especially common, but it is a ‘thing’ - there’s even a Wikipedia page about sexually induced sneezing!
A vaguely similar thing is: people sneeze when they look at the sun. True story! Sneezing is weird, so are orgasms. It sounds like they’re a little jumbled together with your guy, and I hope you’re both able to laugh about it - and that you get good at dodging out the way before he headbutts you :)
I Masturbated With My Best Friends and It Made Me Smile
My two closest lady-friends are two of the most sex-positive people I know. One of them is poly and does feminist porn; the other was raised in a kink-positive lesbian household and comes with me to Pride every single year. Obviously, I have good taste in friends.
Not too long ago, we were having a “girls’ night in,” as we often do, but things were just getting… raunchier than usual. Maybe it was the wine and rum we were downing, or maybe it was just one of those hot summer nights that makes you want to be sleazily open-minded. Either way, it was a rather sexier evening than I was used to spending with these ladies.
First we were chatting about porn; next we had taken off our clothes; shortly after that, we started photographing each other’s naughty bits on my instant camera; and sometime after that, it was suggested that we masturbate side-by-side.
The only folks who’d ever seen me jerk off were lovers of mine and strangers on the internet (who never even saw my face), so this was a new and ever-so-slightly intimidating prospect for me.
We drank a little more, turned the lights out, laid on our backs on the floor of my friend’s basement, and got down to business.
At first, I was unsure if I’d be able to reach orgasm. I didn’t have any toys with me, and it’d been a long while (as in, several months) since I’d gotten myself off with just my hands. My fingers felt fumbling and inadequate.
However, then one of my friends started having an audible orgasm just a few feet away from me. I have always found “sex sounds" to be the biggest turn-on – bigger than visuals, sometimes bigger than actually being touched – so this helped a hell of a lot. I found myself spilling over the edge of orgasm within thirty seconds or so.
That same friend came again a couple minutes later (which I listened to with jealous ears, being pretty mono-orgasmic myself). As for our other friend, it turned out she had fallen asleep. I guess she’d had a long day. And also was extremely drunk.
At some point, one of us said, “We should do this again soon, but with toys.” And then someone else said, “This is like… the culmination of our entire friendship.” It’s true, it kind of was. It’s surprising that it never occurred to us to do this before, actually.
So, I had a fun group masturbation experience and I’m looking forward to doing it again!
Have you ever masturbated with friends/non-lovers before? Did you enjoy it?
A smokin’ solo guy video…
“For anyone who gets off on solo guys and moaning, oh my god. This video is amazing. I’m watching it right now and I’m so, so wet.”
Click ‘read more’ to see it! (it’s Flash, alas, so won’t show up on iPads, iPhones or things like that.)
Sex dreams can be really hot. Or really weird. Or just plain WRONG.
I’m pretty sure I’ve written about this before, but anyway…
Sex dreams happen.
Some girls get to have orgasms in their sleep!
Sometimes both ‘sex’ and ‘completely unrelated topic’ can happen in the same dream, with unnerving results.
DON’T WORRY ABOUT THEM! BRAINS ARE JUST WEIRD.
Anyway, here we go…
“Is it possible for girls to orgasm in their sleep? Cause I think I may have before… but I don’t know if it was real, or just in my dream!”
Yep, this is totally a thing that can happen! And sometimes, you luck out and have a super-realistic, hot and sexy dream…
“So last night I had an *incredible* sex dream. It was actually my first sex dream and it made me quiet excited so I just wanted to share.
So I was in this competition thing with another girl and we were going against each other to see who could make a guy come faster. She chose to give a handjob and I chose to fuck my guy. And we were in front of a TON of people who were all watching us, which just made things even more sexy.
So the competition started and I climbed on my guy and started going at it as hard as I could. And it felt ah-ma-zing. I could feel him moving in and out of me and I was grinding my clit against him and all these tingly, warm, fuzzy sensations were coursing through me. The people watching were just staring at us and it made me feel even more pleasure and I don’t even know how to describe it.
I kept going and the whole time, my partner was just watching me, watching me go up and down and grind on him and the fact that he looked so pleased made me feel *so good*!
Finally, I was getting close to climax, but my partner wasn’t so I went faster and harder which only made me orgasm faster and harder. And my god. I wish I could orgasm like that in real life. It was great. Unfortunately, I woke up right as I was climaxing, but when I was awake, I could still feel it. My legs were clenched together and I was shaking and ugh. It was wonderful. I lost the competition, but hey. Best (dream) orgasm ever was worth it.”
Sometimes they’re about an unexpected person, and that’s A-OK.
“I’ve been having a lot of sex dreams (they’re FANTASTIC) about a boy in my class. I’m not that attracted to him in real life, he’s cute, but I don’t have any feelings for him.. So why WHY do i dream about him?”
Who knows? Maybe it’s the fact he’s just cute and your brain is looking for a harmless person to have sexy thoughts about. Unthreatening, y’know? OR MAYBE IT’S COMPLETELY RANDOM.
“I’ve been having these odd dreams of me masturbating. Like I’ll be at school or somewhere very public and then I get the urge to touch myself. When I wake up I still have the urge to masturbate but feel dirty doing it. What should I do?”
So, maybe it’s that masturbation is a thing your brain is thinking on right now, and you dream about it. But at the same time, your head wants to the same dreams you always have about being at school. So they both happen at once… and BOOM! WEIRDNESS! It’s just like if you ever have the Naked Dream, so don’t feel weird about it, you know? It’s just a sort of coincidence.
“So I just had a really weird sex dream, like, really weird. So basically my friend gave me a bag of clothes and told me to go get dressed in the bathroom and it was a pink dress with ribbons and frills and shit and a huge pink diaper. And I got dressed and looked at myself in the mirror and got really turned on and started trying to like touch myself through the diaper but I couldn’t so I started crying and then my friend came in and started grinding against the diaper and it was so good. and then I woke up, got off because I was horny as fuck, and then kinda freaked out over what I was getting off on, and then came here. Is this like a thing? Am I like a pedophile or something oh my god. Should I just take this as another really weird stupid dream that doesn’t make sense, (oh god but I can’t stop thinking about it). What’s with the weird kinks?”
OK, here’s the thing: nobody knows how this weird grey mush we call ‘a brain’ actually stores thoughts and memories. IT IS A MYSTERY! Also, nobody has any idea why we dream or what the fuck is happening while we do. For all anyone knows, we store our thoughts in alphabetical order, ‘diaper’ and ‘desperately want to get laid’ are next to each other, and that’s why this dream happened. I really don’t think you can read anything into it AT ALL.
So try and be chill, like this lady:
“Craziest. Sex Dream. EVER! So in the dream, I was at home, except it was like my room had been mirrored? The next thing I know, my MOTHER was using a magic wand vibrator on my clit and I had the. best. orgasm. ever. I woke up and really couldn’t look my mom in the eye, but I’m over it now. Haha, that was literally the most awkward ‘how did you sleep?’ conversation.”
Yep, it makes no sense. But these things happen! (Confession: most of the time when I have dream-sex, it’s some annoying interlude that happens while I’m getting a typewriter to Finland to stop a plane crashing with my best friend’s hamster in it. Like I’ll be trying to get through security at the airport and suddenly I’m being fucked by the guard up against a desk and all I can think about is “I HAVE TO CATCH THIS FLIGHT DAMMIT… OR… THE HAMSTER!”)
“I always have sex dreams about people I know, and not people I want to have sex dreams about!! Like my best girl friends (who I’m not attracted to) other guy friends who ditto aren’t attracted to, and even my father and sister (super gross). I know it’s just my brain sorting out stuff, but I feel so awful the next day, like I’m cheating on my boyfriend! Any tips for unwanted sex dreams, or any other readers have similar experiences?”
Lots of similar experiences! Listen, there’s no clever way to control your dreams. But think about your dreams as your brain picking random thoughts out of a hat.
Sometimes, ‘sex’ comes up. But then your brain is all ‘let’s pick a couple more thoughts too!’ If you’re lucky, it’s the person you’re really hot for. If you’re super-unlucky, it’s a close relative. But either way, it’s all random. DO. NOT. WORRY.
And when you win the random-sex-dream lottery, it’s really fun!
"This has never happened to me before, but it just happened last night, so I HAD to share. When I was sleeping, it’s almost like I woke up a little because I was having a “good” dream… I think I was lucid dreaming because I sort of knew what was going on when I started touching myself through my underwear. my mouth opened as I rubbed harder and harder, but somehow I was still totally in sleep mode.. and then I orgasmed! I’ve orgasmed in my sleep before but it wasn’t from touching myself, so it was so new but nice!”
“So I’ve been able to notice when I’m dreaming for a while now - and that’s usually when I have my wet dreams. But this morning while I was dreaming I was able to induce 4 orgasms in a row! I’m still not able to manipulate my dreamspace completely but I was so excited by this I had to tell someone.”
come say hi.